I have made a date with some one - whom I will call or classify as an "ex" all though not really around long enough to be an ex per say. ( but i tried once years ago and he's still around)
None the less, this ex has asked me repeatedly to join him away from his messy abode and take a weekend to get to know him better (trip). So, finally I have agreed.
We are supposed to leave next Friday the 22nd of Jan. 2005. He is supposed to surprise me with an idea of where to go.
My dilemma, why did I even tell him yes? *Shakes head*
I confuse myself. I do not and clearly know that he is not for me nor do I want him. I could be bored or I could just be insane. Either way, I am going.
Not happy with my choice but glad to be getting away for a few days with out having to stress. It’s in his hands. Although, I should be stressing being that I don't trust his hands. Literally - nor on me... (now that’s a point to ponder) hmmmmm...
I know he expects some sort of action while we are away. He feels he can win me if he shows me his feelings for me. I have been nothing but honest with him.
I don’t like how he lives, I don’t like his cleanliness, I don’t like his smell, I don’t like his lack of ambition or passion for life. Yet, here he is asking me to go away with him, to "spark some sort of, of, of, well something or other...heck I don’t know what he is thinking.
I am not Cinderella or sleeping beauty, I am fully awake and do not need a prince to save me (he lacks the prince thing anyway)
*sigh*
I just don’t know why I am going besides maybe I am bored. OR could be the lack of sex I have had in the last year. (yes, I do play it safe)
So, another question, how much alcohol will I be drinking before I let him touch me?
Crap! The situations I get myself into sometimes. I could turn around and say no, I know I really should.
Maybe I will
Than again,
Maybe I won't.
